Mindfulness In A Mindless World

We are living in a world in which everyone is focusing on the "self", such that there is little room for tolerance, no to mention compassion or loving kindness. Many of us have developed the "mine-is-better" attitude that disposes us to see what is different from us as inferior, and hence the prejudice and discrimination. It is this mindlessness that makes it difficult for us to relate to people of different cultures, religion, and perspectives.

To promote good relationship, mindfulness is a prerequisite.

Mindfulness, as opposed to mindlessness, is a deliberate act of engaging with others and inclining to see things as they really are. Mindfulness is self-intuitive wisdom that purifies the heart, eliminating the negative emotions of anger, greed, hostility, insensitivity, and judgment, among others.

The realization that everything in this world is impermanent tells us that we should live in the present moment. Living moment-to-moment enables us to loosen our grip on the future - the future that we are all striving to create for ourselves, the future that is devoid of past problems and past unpleasant experiences. It is this preoccupation with controlling the future that creates our mindlessness of others. Essentially, we put ourselves before others. We do not see the humanity in others. Worse, we overlook the reciprocity of the Christian Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Matthew 7:12

According to Buddha, human suffering is a result of craving and attachment to things that are impermanent. We have pre-conditioned ourselves to a certain way of life that we think will make us happy. Mindfulness and living moment-to-moment can liberate us from this "conditioned" happiness; instead, we may find the deeper sense of peace and harmony within each of us - which is contentment. Happiness is dependent on circumstances, and therefore is fleeting and impermanent; while contentment, which is trust in the present moment, lasts because the present moment is exactly as it was meant to be. Even Jesus said, "Give us this day our daily bread. . ." God does not promise us a tomorrow.

Nonself is self elightenment. It is the foundation of mindfulness. Nonself requires us to utilize the power of deep listening - listening to our inner voice, which tells us that all threads of our experience are not uniquely ours; in fact, all these threads are common to many other individuals. Through ignorance or non-enlightenment, we have created a trap for ourselves through our reactivity and focus on our own experience, and that trap fosters the delusion that the beliefs we cling so tightly to appear to be the only truth, and the only way. But there is another way - not out, but through. Only mindfulness can make us perceive others' plight through loving kindness and empathy. Nonself enables us to develop a clear, compassionate heart with loving kindness for others. Nonself makes us focus more on doing the right thing, rather than on personal satisfaction, that is, the value, truth and rightness of what we do, instead of the results. Nonself is turning to our inner self for personal transformation.

Dalai Lama, the Tibetan spiritual leader, once said he was able to relate instantly to people of different cultures, religions, and perspectives, because he was simply meeting a fellow human being with the same desire to be happy and to avoid suffering, just as he was.

Indeed, mindfulness is putting oneself in others' shoes, and in so doing, one may have totally different perspectives of not only one's own experience, but also how one may react to that experience. Mindfulness is simply a conscious way of positively connecting with others through loving kindness for good relationship.